TV & Gum Are Awesome

It may be unhealthy to ‘ship something so hard. (Photo courtesy fox.com)

GLEE
FOX | Thursday | 9:00 p.m.

Don’t jump all over me, here, Gleeks… but that felt a little… anti-climactic? I mean — I *knew* Rachel was going to her second audition. And I *knew* that Blaine was maybe gonna propose to Kurt. And I also knew that they were gonna dominate Regionals (okay, I didn’t know… but I knew), and had a mega-feel that Unique was the other half of Ryder’s txt exchange with “Katie.” You know what I mean? So, the biggest surprise was that Brittany made it into MIT? And Wemma finally got married? Ehhh, I wanted to be SHOCKED, yo!

Let’s hang on that Brittany thing for a minute — and by “hang” I mean, ponder the fact that of all the ridiculous things that Glee has brought us over the past four seasons, THIS might be the most ridic. I mean, what? Brittany’s brain has some string of numbers in it but she can’t perform basic math functions? Okay… (Don’t hate me because I never fell for Brittany!) At least her goodbyes to everyone were sweet…

Favorite part of the episode, though? Wait for it… it’s Blaine-related. (Now *there’s* a shock, I KNOW!) But srsly, that scene with Blaine and Kurt, hangin’ with Patty Duke and Meredith Baxter! I mean, how awesome was that? I feel like week to week the genius of Ryan Murphy isn’t really on full display these days — and then something amazing like that shows up and you’re all… ahhhhh yeahhhh. Bravo, dude.

The Wemma wedding was cute. I liked it. What I didn’t like? Ryder freaking out on Unique! We teach tolerance and awesomeness in THIS glee club, dude! Lighten up. I mean, I get it. He’s a teenage boy, and so sharing something with a BOY when you thought it was a GIRL when you’re already feeling vulnerable is SCARY and feels like it MEANS SOMETHING. But c’mon, Ryder! It’s Unique! Just be cool, bro.

And then there’s Rachel. Aside from the fact that this storyline is ALL KINDS OF NOT REAL… I want this to happen. How great would the arc be next season? (Wait, a little too Smash-y? Hmmm…)

Final thought: As much as I love Klaine, I can’t help but wonder why they are bothering with the maybe-engagement storyline? Where do you think THAT will pick up next season? And what are your OTHER predictions for next season?

fillmoresf:

Join us! Tickets on sale this Saturday at 10 a.m.

Whoaaaaaaaaaaaaa! Yes, plz.

This, all day. And then some. (Photo courtesy fox.com)

GLEE
FOX | Thursday | 9:00 p.m.

Is it just me, or are a lot of storylines on Glee kinda, like, draggin’ ON these days? I mean, I get it. This show is basically all about continuing storylines (regionals! Klaine! Finchel!), but… really? Are we still harping on poor Tina for crushing on a gay boy? Are we still watching Santana harass people in an apartment that she’s crowded her way into? And are we still speculating on Brody’s extra-curriculars? Are Marley and Jake still insecure about each other? Are we still… worried about Ryder at ALL? IS FINN STILL FINDING HIMSELF?

I like some things! Don’t get me wrong. I like… Kurt. I like Blaine. I like that the blonde cheerleader girl has found a heart! And I like the realness of watching Unique’s struggles on the reg(ular). It’s just that these repeating issues with everybody else are starting to hassle me mega. I don’t know how much more I can worry about Wemma, guys…

I do like that Finn may or may not have found his way in life last night (ala Marley — good job, girl!), and I hope that it’s his REAL way in life, rather than the military, and the glee club, which were sorta-ways of life that didn’t quite work out. He’s so happy when he’s around the kiddos! But one thing: can he stop the creepy mentioning of Rachel as his future wife and all that? I loved their moment a couple weeks back when they knowingly referred to their perhaps-future together… but… keep that ish between just you too. People be thinking you’re CRAZY if you talk like that. Even gigolos…

Best/weirdest part of the night? Sue and Blaine dueling on Nicki Minaj and Mariah Carey (respectively). Um, what?

Final thought: Where my Santana fans at? How do you feel about her NYC storyline thusfar? I feel like she’s getting the shaaaft. She’s relegated to worrying over Brody and it’s BORING. I need Santana doing more Paula Abdul dance numbers, okay? Who’s with me?

This moment brought to you by… SOMEBODY HOLD ME.

Welcome back… one of you! (Photo courtesy fox.com)

GLEE 
FOX | Thursday | 9:00 p.m.

Phew, I’m all caught up on Glee — and boy am I glad! Sectionals! Except… not quite the Sectionals we all had in mind…

MARLEY RUINED SECTIONALS! D’oh! Surely New Directions had another song comin’, right? Instead, Fainter went down at the end of “Gangnam Style” and that was it (or were the confetti-blasters a sign that that WAS the end? I’m confused). Dang, new girl! (Was it annoying that they performed “Gangnam Style”? It kinda irked me.)

(SIDE NOTE: My friend Elisa used to call me “Fainter” because I passed out while we were at an Anne Frank exhibit in high school. Awwwwkward.)

You know what I realize, though, with all the oldies around for the holidays? I don’t really miss them! I know the hardcore fans are, like, swearing under their computer-breath at me right now, but it’s true. When they are away, I hardly remember they existed. I like the newbs! I like Jake! I like Marley (usually)! I hate the new Quinn! But I totally love Jordan Catalano! I MEAN RYDER. (OMG DYSLEXIA.)

I’m alone in this, right? I’m almost positive that I am. Y’all are a loyal bunch, Gleeks.

And don’t get me wrong — I miss the oldies! I wish I could swap Brittany for one of them! (OMG CAN OF WORMS.) But I just think on a week-to-week basis, I don’t. Or maybe it’s that we’re seeing enough of them here and there to make it work. I don’t know, guys. At any rate, I still dig it.

(Also, Sarah Jessica Parker + “Let’s Have a Kiki” = love.)

Final thought: PLUS — OMG KLAINE REUNION. Not quite. But a girl can dream, right?

Oh hey, look — the newbs are proving themselves! (Photo courtesy fox.com)

GLEE
FOX | Thursday | 9:00 p.m.

So, basically, I’m never deleting this episode from my DVR. This lil’ number is going to be in my life for forever. On repeat. I’m going to watch it a bazillion times. Because, awesome. So awesome! So Glee! So happy/sad/eyebrow-raising/eyeroll-inducing/MAGIC. Right? This is why we watch Glee! Songs we love, great musical numbers and a little wacky drama. Love love.

One question: Why is it that of the four recently-brokenhearted kiddos (I’m not counting Santana and Brittany but I SHOULD, I know. OH GOD, OR TINA AND MIKE.), I secretly only care about Blaine’s feelings? Blaine is the only baddie in the lot! He cheated on Kurt! He’s a booger! But… those eyebrows. Those eyebrows EMOTE. And lately they are emoting the hell out of this situation. And I DON’T WANT TO SEE THEM SAD. Darren Criss had my heart, and he also had the night’s best musical number — “Beauty School Dropout.” The guy is an effing STAR, and I have a feeling that post-Glee he’s going to be a thing. More Broadway for sure. He was born to be on a stage, singin’ with that beautiful voice. (AND I LOVE HIS FACE, OKAY?)

Those of you who have been in this thing from the start were probably sad over the Finchel weirdness there near the end. Me, I just thought it felt a little out of place. (But I’m still — relatively — new.) Why DID Kurt and Rachel come home, if all they were going to do was be aggro toward their former lovahs? Finn and Rachel were AWKWARD, and Kurt blew Blaine off like it wa’n’t no thang. AT LEAST TALK TO THOSE EYEBROWS, GUY! Just go back to New York, you snooty jerks. Your friends are over you TOO. So there!

Santana and Brittany, howevs, are totally adorable, and it was great to see Santana in action (and Rizzo is OBVIOUSLY the play’s best character). PARTICULARLY poignant to have Unique hitting the notes alongside her. Less thrilling to have slutty-ho-bag jerk-face instructor Cassandra doing it too. But I will say THIS — Kate Hudson on Glee? Stroke of genius.

And the newbs? They did pretty good! Marley and Ryder? I could have done without the bulimia storyline, but Ryder’s cute little chat with her to get her out of her funk melted ma’ heart! The new blonde witchy-bitch was a little over the top, but she’s got spunk! And there was very little focus on Puck’s half-bro this week, but that guy isn’t so bad neitha. I think the season is a — DARE I SAY IT — winner! (Wha? Who would have guessed?!)

Do you agree?

Final thought: Was Tina driving everyone crazy? Or was it just me?

Wuv u, Kurt. (Photo courtesy fox.com)

GLEE
FOX | Thursday | 9:00 p.m.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahadl;fijs;daifja;dfilasdjfliasjdfaAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

What just happened?

Far be it from me to deem myself much of a “Finchel” fan, but dang that was rough. All the Finn moping? All the Rachel making-an-effort-to-make-it-okay…ing? Pitiful on all sides. (And what was with Finn’s discharge from the Army? Awkward…) Will they stay broken up? So Rachel can flit about with Brody? (I’m not sold on that guy.) Why wouldn’t Finn sing at the club? All I know is that a) Rachel is looking a LOT like Lea Michele these days, and b) Finn is more of a directionless doof than he ever has been… and now he’s going to direct the musical at school?

OH GOD, IS FINN GOING TO TAKE OVER FOR SCHUESTER WHILE HE’S AWAY?

Oh, dear…

Other stuff! Brittany and Santana broke up because Santana decided she likes looking at other girls… at her school that is within a relatively quick driving distance (close enough, anyway, to regularly do laundry with Brittany). Huh. If that isn’t the total-opposite-of-commitment, I don’t know what is. Will figured that Emma would be more than happy to pack up and move to DC for awhile while he explores his new opportunities — but DUN DUN DUNNNN, she doesn’t want to. (YOU MIGHT EVEN TAKE WEMMA AWAY FROM US, GLEE?! Really?)

But, dudes. WHAT ABOUT THE KLAINE TROUBLEZ? What about Blaine’s HEARTBREAKING dedication to Kurt at Callbacks? What about Blaine’s… indiscretion? What about Kurt’s refusal to pay any attention to B AT ALL? (I’m not excusing his behavior, but seriously Kurt has been acting like a D-I-V-A.) What about all of those Darren Criss tunes half-spoiled by Cory Monteith duetting (I KID, I KID — SORTA!)

The night was dead-on for songs. Klaine and Finchel sang No Doubt’s “Don’t Speak.” Finn and Blaine performed “Barely Breathing.” And then ALL the couples performed “The Scientist” (with bonus clips of better times! OMG!). Holy crap. It was great. And sad. So, so sad.

Guys, weigh-in… Who’s gonna make it? Who’s over for good?

Final thought: AND HOW MANY TISSUES DID YOU GO THROUGH WATCHING BLAINE SING “TEENAGE DREAM”?

E’erybody needs a makeover like THIS! (Photo courtesy fox.com)

GLEE
FOX | Thursday | 9:00 p.m.

Dudes. Next week’s Glee is going to be SO UPSETTING. Every one of our major relayshes is up in the air!!!!!! Will and Emma are going to be deciding their future over Will’s new position with the arts council (or whatever it is…)! Finn and Rachel are going to deal with her MAKIN’ OUT WITH BRODY (oh my)! AND — NOOOOOOOOOO! — Kurt and Blaine are going to have some heart-to-heart action over their newly-long distanced ‘ship. SHIT IS HITTING FANS, GUYS. SO MANY FANS.

Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…

Change, it be upon us. They gave us three weeks of transition time to get used to all of these new, moving parts — and now comes the messy part. The ramifications of transition! B-b-b-b-butttttttttt, I thought life could go on this way forever!

Then again, who has kinda forgotten that Finn even existed over the past couple weeks while he’s been away, though? Eyuoooops! New York was so intoxicating! And the Rachel/Kurt friendship move felt so natural! It was like Finn had just… disappeared! Brody isn’t thaaaat dreamy, even. It’s just that Finn is such a doofus that he never totally made sense to begin with (amirite?????). Still, his sad little face popping up at episode’s end was still a major bummer.

A SADDER FACE THAT WAS A BIGGER BUMMER? BLAAAAAAAAAAAINE. Dear me, the only reason I watch at this point is for Darren Criss, and Blaine being sad makes me sooooo sad. Take his phone call, Kurt! Let him wear his signature ties, Sam! MY GOD, PEOPLE, LET BLAINE BE BLAINE. So, Blaine is class president now, but it doesn’t mean anything to him. And Sam wants to be bros. And Kurt isn’t answering his calls. And he still looks 10 years older than all of the other students. WHAT IS HAPPENING.

More importantly, WHO THE EFF WILL MAKE BLAINE HAPPY IF KURT DUMPS HIM? I’m thinking long term here. We have to find an alternative! I know Lima is bursting with young, hottttt gay men, but… Blaine wandering aimlessly in the interim makes me want to cry. Don’t cry, Blaine!

You can’t blame Kurt either, man. Sarah Jessica Parker is his new BEST FRIEND. That’s after she threw herself — and by “herself,” we obvs mean her character’s self — at him in a moment of whiny desperation. (Wait, why did that happen? Anna Wintour hired somebody who confesses her inadequacies to the new intern on his first day?????? AHHELLNAH.) He’s going to be a fashion SUPERSTAR! And at his first runway show… all the boys will be wearing BOW TIES. ( Because the Klaine love is. forever.foolz. FOREVER. Please?) 

Oh, right… and the Schuester stuff. 

(Is it just me or is the McKinley leg of this tour feeling stale and same-y with all the OTHER stuff going on…? Blaine agrees.)

Final thought: Pardon me, but I must bring this up… When the students close their lockers on the show, the combo locks are usually LOCKED and attached to the door somehow as they are being closed. Therefore, the entire system is HIGHLY FAKE-O-RAMA. Noticed this? Got comments on anything ELSE (because there is SO MUCH GOING ON)?

Yayyyy, original Gleeks! (Photo courtesy fox.com)

GLEE
FOX | Tuesday | 9:00 p.m.

OH MAN, that was a doozy! I cried a little! I “aw shucks”ed a little! I smiled A LOT! Oh, Glee, that was a near-perfect send-off! 

Except, of course, for that one HUGE pile of SUCKITUDE: KURT NOT GETTING INTO NYADA… Wth.

Listen, I came to the Glee game late, but from what I gather I’m not entirely alone in my distaste for Rachel Berry. She seems hit and miss throughout the fandom. I get why she’s liked. I get it. She’s the un-liked girl who became popular and now she can be a star. (AND SHE’S MEGA TALENTED.) But… eh. EH. Like, of course it was gonna be Rachel who makes the most of herself, because she’s Lea freakin’ Michele and it’s Ryan Murphy and that’s how the world works. But… seriously… nobody is going to be that into a New York-based storyline that doesn’t involve Kurt. Right? RIGHT?! I certainly won’t be. Hopefully there is still hope on that front, because dude’s got TALENT. And his NYADA audition was magic.

On the other hand, the Finchel scene in the car at the train station was.dynamo. Hats off to Lea Michele, who delivered maybe one of her best moments ever on the show — those tears were AMAZING (and kept going!)! Powerhouse! And Cory Monteith was perfect too — showing a brave face but obvs hurtin’. So great. And a great way to send Rachel in a new direction. (I *loved* when everyone showed up to support her departure. Adorbs.)

So where does everyone end up post-graduation, though? WE DON’T REALLY KNOW VERY MUCH. Mike’s going to Chicago. (BOOOOO! He’s my favorite.) Mercedes is going to L.A. (Sadddd! I love her!) Santana may or may not be going to Kentucky and/or New York. Finn might be joining the army (but then how would he be on next season?!). Puck graduated but…? And Quinn! WHERE! WHAT!

WHAT THE HECK. I HAVE NO CLOSURE. It wasn’t even a cliffhanger! It was like a “Ohhh snap, hit us up in the fall to find out what you thought you’d know tonight.” MAN. Maaan.

At least Klaine didn’t break up!

Fave moments: Sue and Quinn’s goodbye and hug (amazing!). Rachel and Finn at the train station (tears!). And, HELLO, the recreation of a) the original glee clubbers’ lame-o “Sit Down You’re Rockin’ the Boat” but also B) BURT DOING THE SINGLE LADIES DANCE. I’m going to YouTube that for days.

Final thought: What did YOU think of the finale? And what were your fave moments?

Oh. Yeah. These people were there too. (Photo courtesy fox.com)

GLEE
FOX | Tuesday | 8:00 p.m.

First off, pals. I fear it feels lately like all I’m writing about is a loop of Gossip Girl, The Voice and Glee. Well, in fact, that IS what’s going on. It’s terrible! What is happening!!! I know. Ugh. Life is nuts right now and it is what it isss. Plus, let’s face it — I’m annoyed with George’s girlfriend situation on Suburgatory (especially after that moving-in thing last week!). I’ve falled behind on Criminal Minds. CSI was hella dull last week. I missed Once Upon A Time! Nobody cares about Fashion Star! And Blue Bloods… well, that’s Friday nights. OH AND I’M TWO WEEKS BEHIND ON THE VAMPIRE DIARIES. Life, geez!

ANYWHOOO — sometimes the end of the TV seasons sees shows cramming a whole lot into a very little bit of time. Gossip Girl is hitting that scenario harrrrd (how RUSHED does Dair feel, anyway?), and Glee is getting there. At least someone had the foresight to give next week’s ep a two-hour block so that we have some room to breathe. Still. Lotta ground to cover!

This week was designated to that rite of passage known as PROM, and much of the action was dictated by Brittany and her wacky dinosaur theme. Whatever, it was fun. Possibly more fun? The fact that Becky and Puck got to have their own run as King and Queen of anti-prom! And then Finchel took top honors at the real thing! (Kinda…) What I loved most, though, was Finn’s fierce support of Rachel throughout — especiallyyyy to Quinn! (Heyyy, maybe that kid won’t be a terrible husband! Wait, I still can’t get behind that idea.)

Anddd Klaine. Cute. Oh, Chris Colfer — how I love thee. OH, DARREN CRISS! ldkjafsldfajsdfasdfdfsdf. Love. These two. Oh man. OH MAN. Kurt’s acceptance of Blaine’s terrible hair situation gave me hope for the future of this ‘ship, guys. I THINK THESE TWO CRAZY KIDS ARE GONNA MAKE IT. At least that’s what I hope, in light of the reveal that there will be a definitive answer to their future post-graduation by finale’s end… Gulp.

Final thought: It’s not that I don’t like Brittany, but just… What? I don’t get it. The acting is terrible, and the character is just so hard to… believe? What am I missing, pals? ANDDD, what was your favorite part of the prom ep?

Wait, sorry, Chandler… Who? (Photo courtesy fox.com)

GLEE
FOX | Tuesday | 8:00 p.m.

KLAINE TROUBLE MAKES ME SO SAD. It might possibly just be that I hate to look at Darren Criss’ sad-face, but either way — good lawd, that was not easy to watch! ARE YOU WITH ME?

Glee’s Whitney Houston tribute was overall not quite the uplifting affair that was expected. It was a freakin’ DOWNER, in fact. Troubles between Blaine and Kurt arose with the arrival of a new dude named Chandler who fawned over Kurt in a record store and reminded Kurt… what it felt like to be fawned over? (HELLO YOU DATE DARREN CRISS, YO. STOP COMPLAINING.) When a two-day textfest was discovered by Blaine, it was TROUBS in paradise times 1000, and one of the first times that we were really expected to grapple with Kurt Hummel being less than perfection. Bottom line: we all got flaws, yo! The dudes dealt with their feelings via a coupla hard-hitting Whitney songs, and in the end figured things out… Kinda. But seriously, what DOES happen if Kurt heads to NY? Pretty sure we’re gonna need a pamphlet for that transition…

And not even REGISTERING on the drama spectrum this week? FINCHEL! We didn’t have to deal with Finchel at all. And it felt better, right? It felt GOOD. Instead, that screen time was dedicated to something that I’d like to throw a vote in the Totally Freakin’ Down For category, which is QUINN AND JOE. Quinn is such a great, smoky-voiced hunk o’ wonderful (when they aren’t sidelining her in Awful Town), and even with everything working against him — okay, just the G-O-D stuff — Joe has managed to endear himself to me. Therefore, I dig this. Totally. Only I coulda done without the boner-ific physical therapy scene. Awkwarrrrd.

Final thought: Gotta say — I have NO idea what the Glee peeps have up their sleeves for season four. What are your hopes and dreams for the future? Will Kurt OR Rachel get in to NYADA? Telllll me…?

Please take a moment to admire Kurt Hummel’s locker. (Photo courtesy fox.com)

GLEE 
FOX | Tuesday | 8:00 p.m.

Somewhere along the way there, Glee totally won me over! I know the longtime fans are bemoaning all of these schticky guest star and tribute-ep novelties this season because — omgggg — Ryan Murphy promised otherwise. But I gotta say — I kinda dig ‘em. Maybe it’s because I’m just joining the fold? But Saturday Night Fever? Amazing! And Darren Criss performing “You Should Be Dancing”? C’MON SO PERFECT. Oh-em-geeeeez.

As the kiddos move toward graduation, the stories are moving into the cheesy/silly/awww-shucks category — AT YET I DON’T CARE AT ALL. Sometimes our opinions of these things are affected by where we are in life. Perhaps because I’m in a weird mode of transition as of late, these eps are hittin’ me in a soft spot. I mean, I nearly started crying during a few of these “next steps” pep-talks! I’M NOT KIDDING! The intervention with Finn? Tears welled up, guys! Santana’s acceptance to the school for cheerleading? I totally went, “AWWW,” OUT LOUD. It’s sweet, okay!

And Finn and Rachel — though I don’t love them — were back on point. It’s a relief that Finn is finally making decisions and not letting annoying Rachel walk all over him. Hopefully that was a LEGIT confession, then, and not just a “I’ll be one of the millions to placate Rachel” moment. (Bless Santana for her rant against Rach, eh?)

One question: HOW DOES BRITTANY EXIST? Seriously… Where is Brittany going after graduation? F’real. Is she every leaving McKinley High? Wow. Just wow. And Sam’s moment of support for Mercedes was sweet, but… really? That ain’t celeb status. Life outside Lima is gonna be a STRUGGLE, kids.

Final thought: The debut of Alex Newell from the Glee Project? MAGIC. STRAIGHT UP MAGIC. Right?

Anyone else notice Mike’s obscene gestures here?! Yeahhh. (Photo courtesy fox.com)

GLEE
FOX | Tuesday | 8:00 p.m.

What could Glee do to keep me coming back FOREVER, week after week?! HIRE RICKY MARTIN FULL TIME. (Please, PLEASE!)

I’m not even joking guys, Ricky Martin was MAGIC on Glee, and if he wants to make the big leap to a full-time role on this oddball comedy, I am soooooooo in. I’M SO IN.

And technically, the wheels are in motion/the groundwork’s been laid for just such a commitment to be made. Ricky’s character, David Martinez, was given the job as Spanish teacher at McKinley High, so he’s baaaaasically able to re-appear anytime he wants, right?! And seriously… with David Martinez just down the hallway in every single scene… WHY NOT SHOW HIM?! THEY SHOULD SHOW HIM ALL.THE.TIME.

Hehehehehehehe…

This episode was sweet. I loved Santana’s semi-inappropriate rant that brought about a shift within Will to give up Spanish. (Duhhh!) I loved that Emma’s pamphlet-happiness brought her the tenure job. (Do high school’s honestly have “tenure” positions?! They shouldn’t. Some teachers are terrible.) I loved Becky and Sue’s heart to heart at the end. I loved Sam and Mercedes’ SO OBVIOUS, AWESOME lovefest. (Sorry, Shane!)

AND, I loooooooved the moment in the locker room between Kurt and Finn. This scene reinforced that Kurt is THE most magical player on this show. Chris Colfer is fantastic, and this scene — in which Kurt told his stepbro just how talented he thinks he is — is just another in a long, long list of his most fabulous moments.

Final thought: I MISSED BLAINE. WHO MISSED BLAINE???